The Last Quiet Car Ride

The eve before I had my twins reminded me of the night before heading off to college.

I had a nice home cooked meal and as I shoveled in a third helping I knew these last moments would stay with me forever.

I dozed off in my usual uncomfortable, exhausted slumber and awoke to the sound of my phone vibrating. It was time to head to the hospital.

Time had a funny way of standing still as we drove to the nearby hospital. This moment with my husband’s eyes on the road and my hand on my gigantic belly. This moment of comfortable silence in the car. This moment where it was just silly, crazy us. The two of us.

The last quiet car ride.. and clean car ride I should add.

Little did we know...

There would be many days ahead of babies crying and screaming in the back seat. Driving around town as we tried unsuccessfully to get them to give us ten minutes of silence. Praying they would stay asleep as the sounds of their snores and sleep filled the car.

Days of toddler tantrums trying to buckle them up. And launching shoes from the back seat. And throwing toys and bottles. And reminding us that the word NO is the only part of a two year old vocabulary at times.

There would be days of laugher and singing along to silly songs. Days of playing peekaboo from the rear view mirror. Days of hustling to load all the kids up. Days of dirty shoes and heading to baseball games. And days after playing all morning at the park. Or packing up sandy, happy kids after a day at the beach.

Days of racing to the hospital when my water would break after my last child was born. And days of crying from the front seat because I messed up again as a mom and I have no idea what the hell I am doing.

And the days of firsts. Preschool morning when I was just fine driving to school but weeping uncontrollably on the car ride home.

And days of catching the kids holding hands with each other from their seats.

Days of driving home from hospital stays and surgeries for your littles. Trying to be strong when all you feel is a lump in your throat because you can’t make it all better.

Days of ice cream smudged faces and songs blaring from the radio. And everyone arguing over which song to play.

Days of racing home from church when your newly potty trained son decides he has to pee right now.

There would be all those days ahead of us. But for now.... it’s just silence. You and me. On our way to our new life and ride forever. So hang on babe. Our car may never look or sound the same. But how wonderful the noise can be.....